first pd visit

brought yu ze for his appointment with pd at kk today. this appointment was schedule when he was born, not sure what is this visit about. pd mention to us that he is a bit small for his age now. she wants to monitor him closely for his growth. at week 8, he only gain 1.3kg from his birth weight. other growth are ok and well except for his weight. pd wants us to feed him every 3 hourly or max 4 hours, don't let him feed on demand. he is drinking 80ml now and sometimes, he can't finished his feed too. is he drinking too little? 

hubby is very stress over it and wants to give him more. i refuse to do it. i don't want to force feed him then to cause him to puke. won't it make things worse. i rather increase the amount slowly for him. since mummy and daddy are both underweight adults, maybe he is just like us, an underweight baby too. to me, as long as all his other development is good and well, its ok for him to be slightly underweight. am i wrong to think this way?

pd also help us to an appointment to see a surgeon 2 weeks later for yu ze's hernia. this has also cause another stress for daddy.

decided

actually i wrote a blog on to stay or leave last weekend but there is something wrong with the site so it didn't get posted. anyway, now i have decided to leave. 

not long after i quit from my previous company, they had asked me to consider going back again. i rejected their offer then cos i was pregnant. going back means giving up my maternity benefits as i will not work for more than 180 days to entitle to them. so it was a clear cut, no. 

however, they had not stop asking me to consider going back after i delivered. i told my ex-colleague who was talking to me on this issue to give me their terms then i consider. even then, i won't consider going back till next year. i'm not going to forgo my 13th month bonus. thus, will only tender next year so the earliest to go back is in feb 09. to my surprise, they are actually willing to wait for me till then and get a temp staff for the time being. 

 

i'm not sure if this is a good news to me or not. i'm indeed quite happy that they want me back but at the same time worried that i will disappoint them if i didn't do a good job. the position offer to me is a new thing for me. my ex-boss who i had worked with for 8 years guarantee that i can do the new job well and i don't have to worry at all.

 

offer given by them

• near 27% increment from current pay
• retain my 18 days annual leave instead of starting fresh from 14
• 6 month probation (as this is a new portfolio for me)
• other benefits remains
• free transport in the morning (given by ex-boss on a personal basis, hahah.... this is not counted)

to me from now till next year feb, there are 5 more months to go, anything can happen. making such a decision is indeed not easy. after discussing with darling and weighing the pros and cons, going back seems like the best option now. since i have the intention to tender next year no matter what instead of getting a new job, going into a new environment why not go back to a place where i'm familiar with. with any new company, the pay might not match with what my ex-company offer and i won't have the flexibility of taking leave as and when i need. 

 

although i'm not sure if i'm making the right decision now but i have already inform them that i will be going back next year. currently, they are working on the letter of offer for me to sign.

yu ze - 1 month

my little baby is 1 month old liao. he doesn't like to sleep alone, wants to have people around him. he is a little alarm clock now, will cry for milk at 3 hourly. he likes to be carried upright like a big baby so that he can kpo the surroundings. he is always looking up at the ceiling at the lights and anythings that has lines always catch his attention.

end of confinement

finally, today is the end of confinement. surprisingly, i'm not exactly very happy but feel a bit lost. i guess i'm used to having aunty maggie with us. she had been a good help. not only she looks after me and baby well, she even help out with all our housework. 

for the past 28 days, all i need to do is latch baby, feed myself, pump milk and rest. i don't have to do a single thing, i can rest in bed and surf net for the whole day. i'm super free. with her around, i don't have to response to baby's cry and she will do the night feed for baby.

before she go off, she told me if possible to stay away from 'cold' stuff till 40 days. 

now that she had left, i'm all alone to handle baby's needs and wants. i'm really worried if i can do it. lucky that darling is not working this week, he will be around to help out. if not, i really wonder if i can cope.

baby started crying. maybe he knows that aunty maggie had gone back and he miss her too.